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Updates!
posted : Sunday, July 27, 2014
I lost count of the number of times I have used this as a title lol. Basically it's reserved for posts which don't have a focus and those that I do after some sort of hiatus heh.
Starting with an update of my skin condition. Have been going for phototherapy treatment for 3 months now, which has lost its novelty and feeling like a chore now. 2 months ago I was actually cleared to start on oral meds too in addition to topical ones. Was given MTX which I later read was to suppress active cells, also used for cancer treatment :x Since the intention is not to suppress ALL active cells including the vital ones, dosage was not high and I had to take a separate pill (folic acid) to suppress its effects. Developed hives almost daily after I start taking these meds so I got cetirizine to deal with them too.
Overall, prospects looking good. Skin growth definitely stopped (duno what will happen if I stop treatment though) and the patches have more or less smoothen. If you are blind and you touch my skin you probably won't feel a thing heh. Just that the discoloration is still there though. Office cleaning aunty kept telling me I got better now that I have seen doctor, she even sounded a bit relieved lol. Nurses also said that the patches are clearing already, though I thought it looked a bit better only (maybe my expectations are too high?) Getting visibly tanned now and colleagues and friends are starting to notice it. Some asked, I don't feel like explaining most of the time though so I kind of always pass it off as "is it is it?" then hurriedly switched topics :x
But more importantly mentally I felt loads better :)
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Of course there's work which is something I felt going in an opposite direction. If April was the peak then I feel it's going downhill already. Not reli facing much issues with daily work. It's the adhoc projects which I feel I am being an ostrich about. Didn't like them much, it all felt pointless like I don't even agree on what I am doing but I have to do it because I was instructed to. And I am slow enough to load everything on my shoulders when peers so cleverly snuck out of the way.
1. Took over one project from a colleague who left half a year ago, coz second boss was suddenly pressurized and finally realized he needed someone to take over after ignoring it for months. Didn't like these projects which the results can never be supported quantitatively.
2. Also assigned a new project where the aim is against what I always believe which is to spoon feed people. Yes safety is important but don't we always believe that there is only so much engineering measures can achieve? I really could not care much about what the community thinks to be honest.
3. On top of that, took over the a Quest team. Sorry to say but quest, like eidea, or whatever that promotes creativity among staff, has lost its purpose. As if it's not bad enough got arrowed to go for presentation and am now screwed coz I can't even defend our projects's benefits. And there is like maybe 3-4 people in the team who will actually do work.
And thus as I so often do...I became in denial and find excuses and things drag on and on...second boss is shooting me dark looks every time I see him these days. Felt guilty for the past week but I promised myself to make progress over the long weekend. What to do?
And on top of that...there's the people in office...maybe the honeymoon period is well and truly over.
Sigh.
With my department where people always come and go..2 of my team mates left recently so only 2 of the original 6 people when I first joined are left. I always felt that I don't need to consciously plan on things like when to leave and so on because I felt that I will know when the time comes. I felt it for the first time this week. Like it just got real.
We shall see. Maybe at the end of the 3 year contract. Definitely don't want to wait until I am stuck waist high.
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On a more positive note....booked myself a trip to go home in August, had some obligations to fulfil plus it has been about half a year since I was at home and I was really craving for a break and home comforts. It also comes with a road trip which swayed between KK and Miri and finally settled on Miri (though I am skeptical on what we can do there but I have learned that it is not about the destination).
And since I promised myself a solo trip once a year or so I was always looking out for an opportunity. Initial idea includes Tokyo but this time round I wanted sth more budget and short (in view of Korea trip and potentially NZ and Europe next year..and Tokyo doesn't really fit the bill. Scoot had a "CHIONG AH" promo one day so I chiong-ed and booked Taipei over Deepavali period hahaha. I always felt that I didn't fully visit/appreciate it the last time round. Looking forward to it already.
And crossing fingers and hope Seoul happens in December/January. :)
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