The first quarter passed by in a flash, and suddenly it’s 9/24. 

I was still struggling massively with motivation at the end of December, mainly because of the lack of work. And when the work did come in January, firstly it’s hard to switch from zero to 100 all of a sudden, and my heart was already in Brunei by then. When I came back after taking almost the entire Feb off, March flew by because suddenly things piled up.

So I almost had no time to overthink things, to countdown and think how many more months to go, and maybe that helps in work efficiency. Things are flowing now I think, though suddenly, I am not that looking forward to a return to office environment. Hahah maybe these two are somehow related, but the idea of having to interact and build up relationships with people is suddenly draining again. 

Nevertheless at this rate, I think I know what’s my path and what I will enjoy doing. Like, if I am not going to learn much out of this stint, there’s no point prolonging it. Open to surprises though. 

Scores came out couple of weeks back and I think there’s a mixture of surprise and disappointment this time round. Surprise, because I was fully prepared to be a sacrificial lamb but turned out not to be the case. Disappointed, because even though I was fully prepared I knew I deserved more. Like a promotion, which I feel is way overdue - I mean, come on, my batch mates have been at that grade for 2-3 years now. 

So much for “doing things at my own pace and if I get recognized good for me” lol. But at the end of the day I guess we still have to be grateful in these times? That a bonus is still part of the equation, and one that is not significantly reduced while at that. It’s just an awkward timing to do transition which I landed myself in, I guess. All in the name of a change and seeing things from other angles. 

I have now seen and I now understand that striking out of comfort zone is not for everybody. You really only learn from experience. 

Let’s see what happens next then.