*clearing spider webs*
*vacuuming thick layers of dust*

Blog has been left unattended for quite some time already so its time for some spring cleaning :) I think I realize blogging is much more productive then spending time roaming around aimlessly online.

Shall not go into details about last two weeks - replacing the layers of dust with a super wordy post doesnt seem to be a good idea. But anyway, during recess week:

• Cleared 2.5 auxes alone, though it comes with a price.
• Debated with myself before finally deciding to attend a consultation with Hydraulics prof, and dun reli know wat is going on for about quarter of the time.
• Field trip to supreme court wasnt too interesting. 
• Broke the frame of my specs, and had to buy a new one, while discovering my degree actually went down.
  
• Wanted to go jalan-jalan for one day during recess week, ended up going Funan only after supreme court trip, and felt like buying a new comp again.
  
• Procrastination and more procrastination

Where has my past self gone? I reckon if anybody from my secondary school see me now, they probably cannot believe this is me. Not in terms of physical appearance of course. I gave myself a break after Form 5, no more of those competing for the top spot, and I guess my break is a bit too long. So long that I don't know how to get back on track.

I half suspect I have this case of addiction to the online world. I will know I have work to do, but somehow I cant resist going online for a while, even when most of the time I don't know what to do online. I check my mails multiple times each day. The worse thing is it is not like I don't have enough things to keep me busy and away from the computer. Which results in work piling up.

The NSC doctor told me psoriasis will stick with me for the rest of my life (which sounds seriously depressing when he said that, but it is a fact), and that when I have it controlled, stress will aggravate it easily, so he advised me to try not to give myself too much pressure. I guess he forgot that I am in Singapore, and given my personality the feat is almost mission impossible.

Knowing your weakness is not good enough. Getting rid of it is the only way out.

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I have been making so many wrong decisions this semester, focusing on the wrong things even when I know exactly where my priorities lie. SEP applications open next week and I am yet to do proper research. As usual - "I will do it during e-learning week". At this rate my e-learning week a.k.a self study week will not be my rest week again.

I more than half wish concert is over. It's one of the wrong decisions I made this semester, and no way I am going to repeat this mistake.

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Hall tech training session today was one of the worst I have been in. I couldnt really see the point of conducting this training when, admittedly, I still have so much to learn and I am conducting it on a guy who has much more experience than me. Ended up listening to him lecture because he gets more and more excited about sharing his experiences in his church band. Complete waste of time and throwing us off the real purpose of the training. [Ok, I was getting impatient that time coz i wanted to end fast]. I cant help but wonder why he doesnt feedback to us earlier when he has been in hall for the past two years.

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I sort of foresee this coming but just didnt expect it to happen so soon. Perhaps I am just too idealistic. Things are way different from back then but how did it turned out this way? I am very sure I am not at fault. I tried and I got fed up. Even if it is my fault it wouldnt do harm to enlighten me about it would it? I am clueless. It is disturbing, I don't know how to 除掉我们心中的那根刺.

Times like this makes me miss the 4 of you most.

Labels: NUS, offscript, Raffles Hall, rants, skin, updates